If you do not tell the truth about yourself
you cannot tell it about other people.
-Virginia
Woolf 
The month of November was
supposed to be the beginning of the next 100 days project. I have postponed it until next year. The
holidays are the worst time of year to change a lifestyle. There is so much to do and so much to plan. There
is also the feels; emotions runs high, overwhelm people in good and bad
ways. I wanted to be on a better life schedule
before the holidays. It got snagged by
the little things and they became bigger things. I decided it will be better for my wellbeing
to be honest about what I want to accomplish with the 100 days project.
First I want to live heathier and lose weight. According to information on many health websites and magazines. I am dangerously obese. I am under 5 feet in height and over 200lbs in weight. I borderline on hypertension and diabetes. I have to handle the situation now before it gets worse. Losing weight is a good start but it is my whole lifestyle that is causing the problem. I hate having to mention all of this on an essay. Other people have bared all and worst on the internet but I am not that kind of person and I never wanted to be. I want my online life and real life to work together. I don’t believe that everything has to be online. Some things need to be forgotten or only remembered by a few.
My life is complicated and unhealthy
it is not good for me to continue this way.
I know this and everyone is telling me this. It can trigger a certain kind of bad habit on
my part, I get belligerent. No has to
tell me what is wrong with me when I know and live with it every day.
Second I am a writer. I want to complete works of fiction, sell
them and live comfortably. I have always
told myself stories. I decided to be a
writer over 25 years ago. I didn’t pursue it because I was often told. Have something to fall back on. I was so busy with my day job that I almost
lost my way to creativity. Two years
ago, after reading and listening to some great and some really bad works of
fiction. I decided to do what I have always wanted to. I want to write and sell
fiction. I want to entertain and inspire others to do great things. I want to be recognized by the world as a
writer. I have gotten positive feedback
from some of my work being made public.
So I will do my best to make my brand.
Third my environment is always in
disarray. It is basically a downer. I know that the only way it can change is if
I change it. After dealing with familial
things I don’t have the energy to make my environment efficient. I don’t have the motivation to do what has to
be done. It is a super lame excuse but
there it is. That is one of my many ugly
truths.
Last I want to be
comfortable in the life that I am living.
I don’t want regrets and I don’t want to feel like all I am doing is
existing. I need 30 days to be make
myself glad to be up in the day; another 30 days to follow an exercise regimen;
another 30 days to make my environment efficient and 10 days to make a schedule
and stick to. No pressure.
